Mindful Monday: Are you 'shoulding' on yourself?
Ok - I have a question for you.
How many times a day do you say the word ‘should’?
a.) lots!
b.) once in awhile
c.) never
Thoughts are powerful. We've talked about this lots before, right?
“I should…”
is very different than “I want to…”
'I should' is typically coming from a place of obligation - not from a place of joy or excitement. It's the voice of a victim or martyr. 'I want to...' is empowering!
We are creatures of habit and a lot of times we do things because that’s just the way we're used to doing them.
'I should' is usually an old program or belief system that came from someone else - our parents, teachers, authority figure or society.
What if ‘the way it is’ doesn’t work for us anymore?
We can choose to change it.
Practicing mindfulness is being aware of:
-What you think
-What you talk about
-How you respond or react
-Why you do the things you do
What does mindfulness look like?
* Start to observe your thoughts and behaviours – why you do what you do?
* If you become aware you are thinking “I should…” Stop.
* Ask yourself the question, “Why should I?”
Is it because everyone else does, people expect me to, I can’t say ‘no’
* Start to ask, are these beliefs working for me? And if not, you can choose to change them.
It may not happen overnight. It usually takes time to change habits. But it will happen if you set the intention and start to practice these new ways of thinking, speaking and being.
You will feel happier, more empowered and will be doing things because you WANT to not because you SHOULD.
Enjoy the moment!
Diane