Some weeks the topic I write about for Mindful Monday comes easier to me than others. What I’ve been (re)learning is, when I’m not forcing a topic to materialize, when I allow my thoughts some space to organically form, things flow with more ease.
This sentiment can be applied to so much in our lives.
Do we ever really know what is going to happen? We can have an idea or a desire, but the truth is we don’t really know. The only thing that we can know is this moment.
As I continue to explore on a deeper level the “being okay with not knowing”, I’m noticing over time the more willing I am to be in the unknown, the more natural and comfortable it has become.
It’s truly a moment-to-moment practice.
The ego is the one that wants to know. Wants to control everything. It doesn’t want to rest in the not knowing. It doesn’t trust. That’s just the way it’s made up.
But when we can observe the ego, rather than become lost in it, we can maintain our connection to Self.
When I reflect on my life, I can clearly see the impact of being lost in the illusion of the ego. Living on autopilot was disempowering. There was an emptiness and an insatiable longing for more. The ego told me it wasn't safe to trust and not know. Being caught up in this illusion created fear and anxiety and prevented me from experiencing the depth of peace within my soul.
This was a heavy price to pay.
“Right now you can allow yourself to experience a very simple sense of not knowing - not knowing what or who you are, not knowing what this moment is, not knowing anything. If you give yourself this gift of not knowing and you follow it, a vast spaciousness and mysterious openness dawns within you. Relaxing into not knowing is almost like surrendering into a big, comfortable chair; you just fall into a field of possibility.”
~ Adyashanti
So, how do we access our courage to not know?
By supporting ourselves. When we do, we are accessing our inner resources of strength, courage, clarity, and fortitude.
With a mindfulness practice. We practice being present, trusting, leaning into the unknown, being curious and offering compassion and support to the parts of ourselves that may not feel safe or are not too sure.
By being consistent. Every day, to the best of our ability, we practice, meditate, we are curious. We are present in our body - sensing, noticing, observing.
Take a moment to tune into your body right now. What are you noticing or sensing in your body when you simply think about not knowing?
Do you feel relaxed tense, alert, maybe not sure? Be curious.
Our body holds so much wisdom. It is speaking to us all day long. It’s a matter of stopping, observing, and listening.
When I notice a part of me feels scared or threatened it’s an opportunity to lean into the feeling, explore, inquire, and ask the question ‘What part of me is afraid right now?’
It is an opportunity to offer love and compassion to ourselves, no matter what.
The ego doesn’t know what to do with all of this. It wants concrete facts. But as spiritual warriors our soul will be drawn to being in the unknown. We require the courage to stand in the space with whatever shows up. So, we practice with compassion. The more we practice, the more natural it becomes. This is my experience.
This sitting with the not knowing, it is a way of living in the world; it requires the willingness and interest to be engaged and develop an intimate connection with Self.
This is freedom.
On January 22nd, I learned of the peaceful passing of Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh, at the age of 95. He had a gentleness and clarity, a reverence for the beauty of this moment and whenever I read his words, it touches my soul deeply. I have so much gratitude for his wisdom and teachings that have meant so much to me over the years.
May we all have the courage and desire to let go, to be with what is, to bravely step into the unknown with our hearts wide open.
With love,
Diane