Think back to when you were a child. Were you ever afraid that there was a scary monster under the bed or in your closet? I was.

When it happened, my parents would reassure me that I was safe by turning on the light and we would both look in the closet and under the bed to see that nothing was there. This helped me to feel safe and to be able to go back to sleep.

What my parents were doing was shining light on the truth.

Fast forward to today - as adults fear still shows up. Fear is an emotion that is part of our human experience. For some people it is more prevalent than others.

There may be a situation in your life that brings up a lot of fear. It’s not easy when fear takes over. It can feel like a scary monster rearing its ugly head. We can feel threatened, shaky, unsafe or immobilized.

So, what do we do?

Today I’d like to explore how we can shine light and awareness on the fear and offer ourselves compassion and kindness as a way of being.

It happens…

Something or someone triggers us. We feel afraid. We feel it in our body. Our mind starts thinking lots of thoughts. You know what I’m talking about, right?

Our default may be to react and run away from the fear. We quite often judge the fear and try to push our thoughts and feelings away.

We think we are the fear and, in that moment, have lost touch with our true essence.

All of this creates more fear.

When we hide from fear, we hide in fear.

Our mindfulness practice offers us another approach.

We can observe and support the part of us that is afraid.

We hold the part with a loving presence just like we would a precious child. Knowing it is most likely the Inner Child that wants our love and comfort.

When a child is afraid what do we do?

We comfort the child and tell the child ‘It’s going to be ok’. We may hold the child to help the child to feel safe and at ease.

What if we treated ourselves with the tenderness that we would a child?

The fear doesn’t want to be pushed away. It is longing to be loved and comforted.

Can we be present with the fear?

Can we hold the fear?

There is no fixing in this process. We are loving ourselves while we are afraid. Not loving instead of being afraid.

We are shining light on the darkness.

You see, when we take the time to understand the fear, we may discover or have a memory from when we were afraid as a child, and it feels very similar.

The situation in our life that triggered us may still be there but when we hold it tenderly and support ourselves in a loving way, it’s possible to feel safer in our body.

This is living life from the inside-out.

We don’t wait for fear to show up to show ourselves compassion or to be present.

Being present and compassionate is part of our life practice. This is the way.

When we are consistent with our practice, we develop greater trust and our soul is able to live in a more embodied way. We have more access to our true nature.

So, when fear arises, we have a greater capacity to hold space for the fear knowing it’s not bad, it is another opportunity to practice self-compassion.

Something that comforts me…

I place one hand on my heart and I place one hand on my abdomen.
I breathe into the feeling.
I breathe in love, compassion and support.
I keep breathing consciously.

I might say to the fear “I love you” or “I’m here for you.”

I do this throughout the day for as long as it feels right. I am letting this part know ‘I support you no matter what.’

Sometimes we may realize we can’t do it alone, that we need the help and support of a mentor or practitioner. It’s not a weakness to ask for help, it’s another way of taking care of ourselves, knowing we don’t have to stay stuck or suffer.

If you are struggling and feel like you could use some additional support, please reach out. I’d love to work with you and can offer tools and techniques, like EFT (emotional freedom technique or “tapping”) that will enable you to be with and move through the fear with added assistance.

Our practice is to be here now, bringing more presence and awareness into each moment. Not be here in a future moment when we feel better.

It can be challenging but the less we fight against the fear, the more self-love and acceptance we give to ourselves.

With love,

Diane