We never know where or from whom we’ll learn our next lesson, do we?
One of my teachers who I’m always learning from is my great-niece Maya who recently turned 4.
Not long ago, Maya and I were playing together and I said to her, “You make me so happy.”
Maya replied in a matter of fact kind of way, “Hunny Bunny (this is what she calls me) you don’t need anyone to make you happy. You can make yourself happy.”
Wow. Ok. So much wisdom coming from this old soul, and I received it.
And then as we were colouring, she said to me, “You’re doing a really good job. We are all good at different things. Look at my masterpiece.”
I thought to myself, how often do I say to someone “Look at my masterpiece”?
This was better than any therapy session. Maya was like an alchemist, providing the formula to release some of the old, outdated programming in my subconscious.
This is why I love spending time with Maya. She teaches me time and time again what it looks like to be real, to be yourself, to express freely, creatively, authentically without any apologies.
In my group sessions a lot of our conversation has been around self-compassion, vulnerability and authenticity.
It takes courage to be real.
In our world most people are trying to be like everybody else.
Why? Because many of us were programmed as a child to conform or fit in, to not be too big for our britches, which is essentially saying we aren’t good enough exactly as we are.
For me, the path of self-discovery means unlearning and going back to that place of presence that Maya embodies. Rediscovering who I am.
Practicing self-compassion has never been more important and is something that we make a conscious decision to do - it takes work and practice.
What does self-compassion look like?
Allowing ourselves to feel what we feel.
Letting go of comparing. Knowing we are on our own unique journey.
Saying ‘yes ‘when we want to and ‘no’ when we want to.
Stop ‘should-ing’ ourselves.
We have the courage to honour our truth, and let go of caring how others will react. And when we do, our authenticity is the birthplace of self-worth and fulfillment.
Doing so, means taking a risk. There is a vulnerability in this, and we often need to remind ourselves to be gentle and loving with this process.
If part of you is feeling not enough, fearful or exhausted, try speaking to yourself as you would a child or dear friend.
Whisper a message to yourself like…
I am enough.
It's ok to feel what I am feeling.
I am strong.
I am enough exactly as I am.
Ask yourself, “What do I need?” rather than “What should I do?”
And then listen.
We aren’t trying to be perfect at any of this because there is no perfect, only practice.
Practice it like an emotional dressing room, trying on different clothes or a different way of being. Some things will fit, and some won’t.
We face enough pressure in our daily lives, there’s no need to apply more here.
There’s sure to be some discomfort along the way, all growth requires it.
But over time we find our groove and notice that we're making different choices and even moving beyond some of our outdated thought patterns, like Maya helps me to do.
May we find the courage to be vulnerable and open to the lessons that present themselves, and may we stand in our own strength and happiness, proudly holding up a masterpiece of our creation.
With love,
Diane